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Our coach got his job at the gym because of his answer to a question on the job application about what type of work his military service had prepared him for. His SAS cloak and dagger work trained him to be brutally honest and so he put down - Explosives, murder, arson and assassination. We found a note written in his employee folder by the owner - "Perfect for the elite squad girls"

You Know You're a Gymnast When...

-You are on your hands as much as your feet.

-Leotards and  shorts become more comfy than clothes. 

-You  have the urge to shout stick instead of saying hi.

-Changing into a leotard in less than one minute becomes easy.

-You're able to put on or take off dowel grips in 30 seconds flat.

-Swinging on bars with rips becomes the norm.

-You recycle everything from grips to leotards.

-The gym becomes your second home.

-Your bedroom is clean because you are never in it. 

-Your gymbag is a pigsty because you are always in it.

-Potentially hazardous sports are off-limits until after Nationals or any Chapionship

-You hear football players complaining of "turf toe" and laugh at the simplicity of their foot problems.

-You can beat all the boys doing chin-ups, press-ups and sit-ups.

-Karate is a no-no because you find it hard to kick with flexed feet. 

-You become a master in the field of hand health care.

-When waiting in line at the check out you stand in fifth position.

-You fall asleep in splits. 

-When someone says "bars" you don't think of jail or drinking.

-You worry more about having water than food. 

-You call your dad "Coach" and your coach "Dad" on a regular basis.

-You wonder why the average person goes to touch their toes and can't get past their knees without groaning. 

-You go to grab something off the floor and your leg shoots up to a perfect scale.

-You're not sure if the mirror has become your friend or your enemy. 

-Being corrected isn't considered an insult 

-You rant and rave about the joy of stretching out.

-You learn how to laugh and make light of a mistake at a competition. 

-You think the best cure for a sprained ankle is to tumble on it.(Amy)

-You can't run more than a few steps without doing a hurdle step and round-off.. 

   

Gymnast: The doctor says I can't do gymnastics.                                             
Coach: Oh, he's seen you work out, too, huh?                                                                                

Q. What's the difference between a gymnastics coach giving conditoning and a well-mannered professional torturer?
A. The torturer would apologize first. 

Q. What's the difference between an gymnastics coach and a dentist?
A. A dentist lets you sit down while he hurts you. 

These are rubbish are they?
Well email me with better ones and I will put yours on this page